WTF is “lifestyle change” supposed to mean anyway?

lifestyle changeIf you’re like me, you’ve heard the term “lifestyle change” thrown around quite a bit. For example, it was used plenty of times in the comments on my recent post, My Breakup with Exercise. People are always saying things like, “It’s not about dieting, it’s about making a lifestyle change.” But oftentimes one person’s “lifestyle change” is another person’s diet, and vice versa. So WTF does “lifestyle change” actually mean?

Growing up, I first heard my parents use the term to describe a family friend and the healthy changes she made many years ago. Even then I was confused because her story began with everyone’s favorite diet company, Weight Watchers. Even though she no longer follows the program, she continues to practice some of their tips and tricks to maintain her weight, like tracking what she eats, looking for foods high in fiber, etc. A relative told me about a coworker who “doesn’t diet” but just has “plus days” and “minus days”; if she had a “plus day,” she’d compensate by having a “minus day.” To me, this all still sounds like dieting because it involves monitoring your food intake, following food “rules” or restrictions, and placing value judgements on foods or eating habits as being “good” or “bad.” Of course, you might not agree, and that’s okay.

Although the intention is usually good, telling someone to make a “lifestyle change” is problematic because everyone’s understanding of what that means is different. For example, it could mean switching to sugar-free versions of your favorite foods, or it could mean never eating artificial sweeteners ever again. Those of us who struggle with weight and body image often understand the term to apply to eating and exercise behaviors, but for others it could refer to quitting smoking or taking up a meditation practice or switching to paraben-free bath products.

The beauty of the term, though, is that it can mean whatever you want it to mean — whatever makes sense to you.

At it’s most basic level, a “lifestyle change” means making changes to support one’s personal wellness. Did you know that there are actually seven different dimensions of wellness?

  • Physical wellness can include fitness, diet and nutrition, sexual behavior, substance use or abuse, medical care, and sleep.
  • Intellectual wellness can include the pursuit of knowledge, awareness of current events, and the expression or experience of creativity.
  • Emotional wellness can include stress management and relaxation, as well as self-awareness, self-acceptance, and mental health.
  • Social wellness can include interpersonal relationships, social justice, and community service.
  • Spiritual wellness can include your value or belief system (including but not limited to religion), and finding personal meaning, hope, and optimism.
  • Environmental wellness can include the protection and conservation of natural resources, as well as the health and safety of animals, humans, and our own bodies.
  • Occupational wellness can include job satisfaction, work/life balance, and financial security.

It’s helpful to consider of all of these dimensions because it reminds us that neither our worth nor our happiness nor our “wellness” is defined by our appearance, our fitness, or our diet. Part of figuring out what making a “lifestyle change” means to you is figuring out what dimensions of wellness you want to pay more attention to–recognizing that each are equally valid and important in your personal pursuit of health and happiness.

Last year I taught a course on leadership and we used a ranking activity to help students think deeper about their own values. (Mad props to Steve R. for the activity!) I modified it and I think this version could be helpful in terms of figuring out what “lifestyle change” you might be interested in. Below are 50 different things that could be part of making a healthy “lifestyle” change, in no particular order.

 Weight management

 Fitness/ Strength

 Smoking

 Religious belief & practice

 Community Service

 Finances/debt management

  Job satisfaction

 Inner Harmony

 Environmental conservation

 Social Justice activism

 Hope/Optimism

 Stress management

 Animal rights

Being active

  Nutrition

 Vegetarian diet/ vegan diet

 Mindfullness/ meditation

  Sleep

 Creativity/ Creative expression

 Sexual pleasure/sex life

 Family relationships

 Social life/ friendships

 Avoiding processed foods

 Career Advancement

 Romantic relationships

 Pursuit of knowledge

 Alcohol use/abuse

 Medical care

 Sexuality/ gender identity and expression

 Self-care/ Self-compassion

 Awareness of current events

 Political involvement

 Mental health

 Avoiding artificial sweeteners

 Body image

 Reducing intake of chemicals in bath/beauty/cleaning products, etc.

 Intuitive eating/mindful eating practice

 

 Self-acceptance

Avoiding artificial growth hormones in meat/dairy

 Drug use/abuse

 Community engagement

 

Experiencing new things/places

Eating less sugar/high fructose corn syrup

 JOY!

FUN!

 Eating whole grains

 Work/life balance

 Hobbies/skill development

 Gratitude

 Eating local/food sustainability

 

 Intimacy

Okay, here’s the hard part. Here’s the link to download and print it out: Defining your Wellness Values Chart

  1. Cross off the 10 that either a) you’re already satisfied with, or b) that are least important to you right now. (Remember that this doesn’t mean these things are unimportant, just that they are less important to you, right now, than the remaining 40.)
  2. Now cross off 10 more (30 remaining). Give yourself a time limit.
  3. Now cross off 7 (23 remaining). Take a quick break and then come back to it.
  4. Now cross off another 7 (16 remaining).
  5. Cross off 6 more (10 remaining). This is getting tough, huh?
  6. Cross off 5 more (5 remaining).
  7. Circle the most important wellness element to you at this point in time.

I just did this activity and it was really freaking hard, but I narrowed my top 5 wellness elements to: building fitness/strength, improving family relationships, self-acceptance, intuitive eating, and reducing my intake of chemicals, These are the areas I want to focus on to improve my overall “wellness.” So, for me, a “lifestyle change” means working out, accepting myself the way I am, finding more ways to make meaningful and positive connections with my family, listening to what my body wants, and staying away from processed foods and chemicalized bath and beauty products.

The thing about changing your lifestyle is that it has to be something you actually WANT to do. Wanting to lose weight because you struggle with body image is not the same thing as wanting to change the way you eat. For example, the person in that scenario might experience more success and actually feel better by choosing to focus on positive body image and building self-esteem.

Only you know what a “healthy lifestyle” means for you. And if you’re not sure yet, perhaps this activity will help.

Let me know how it goes! I am hoping to try this with my students next year, and your feedback will be super useful.