I’m trying to find the words to describe Akon without bein’ disrespectful

*Edit* I was wrong. A commenter tells me it’s actually Akon who can’t find the words, so the post has been edited to reflect that.  Whoops!

Of all the unfortunate songs to have stuck in my head, it’s David Guetta’s ft. Akon’s “Sexy Bitch.” Since this has been playing in my brain on repeat I have had some time to actually listen to the words, and I think that Akon needs our help.

You see, he’s singing about this girl he sees in a club (even though in the video, it’s a pool party.)  He thinks she’s really cool – the kind of girl all the other girls want to be. He also alludes to the fact that’s she’s “fast,” whatever that means, and totally an awesome dancer. In the lead-in to his chorus he says, “I’m tryin’ to find the words to describe this girl without bein’ disrespectful.”  Isn’t that nice?

Apparently not, since the best he can come up with is “sexy bitch,” or in the radio edit, “sexy chick.” (I’m not sure which is worse.)  I know I’m a raging feminist and all, but here are just a few respectful ways to describe this woman — just off the top of my head.

“Damn, she’s a really talented dancer.”

“Damn, she is a really beautiful woman.”

“Damn, she is really confident in her body.”

It’s sad when a dude wants to find a respectful way to describe a woman, but just can’t. (Bad role models? Product of a sexist society?) But it’s even worse when he just doesn’t give a shit. From the looks of the music video, I’m going to go with the latter. I’m trying to find the words to describe Akon and David Guetta without being disrespectful…

Damn, they are misogynist douchebags!

Okay maybe sometimes it really is hard to find the words…


  1. *cough* this is the silliest comment to post here, I know, but..
    It’s actually *Akon* who’s tryin to find those words.


    1. Whoops! Thanks for that. Obviously I am not all that keen on the “cool” music these days. Post has been edited!


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